I’m acquiring vast amounts of knowledge lately. I think I could even write a book. I’d call it:
What NOT to Do as a Mom
Do NOT spend too much time on the computer in the morning.
Your children will get creative.
Do NOT let your one-year-old eat sherbet with a pencil.
He will squawk when you take the stolen goods away.
Do NOT try this at home.
Thankfully, my kids are kitchen counter-jumping professionals.
Do NOT trust children in the kitchen.
OK, I spilled the pepper. The second time this year! But I’m certain the lid was tampered with by one of my minions.
Do NOT buy markers–ever!
My girls like to decorate.
Do NOT allow your daughter to bring a dangerous looking bug in the house!
Dangerous looking bug will likely escape.
And finally, do NOT let your toddler get his drinks from the dishwasher.
Or at least stop him immediately, before you take a picture.